Today, many things had happen. My most fear happens
today, to be up on stage letting ppl watch mie. Tat is wat i fear most, to be a
center attention of many ppl. I hate tat kinda feeling which pull down my
self-confidence. But wat am i saying..even in the first place i have no
self-confidence for myself.Im always feeling low. Thinking tat ppl dont respect
mie.Thinking tat im not worth 4 anything. By thinking lyke tat im started to be
somebody else tat i dont want to. Im living in dis werld with a mask. Im not
myself. Im surrounded by ppl tat pretend to be something tat dey are not juz to
make everyone happy.
But im sick and tired of living in dis kinda situation. I
wanna break freely. Moved around anywhere and happily. But dis is reality! Fear
had conquer mie and no one yet had saved mie. I nvr take anything 4 granted but
its life tat take mie 4 granted. im always afraid of losing something and to no
surprise i still lose it.
Enuf of tat! well after the performance, i had my mt
oral. It was fast as i was to go early coz i had dance. Den as usual on tuesday
we had practiced until 5 plus. Get back home. lay my butt to my bed and
rest.......
after all wat the ppl had say..i thought to myself. Why
am i soo fucking afraid?? It is my passion! Dancing is my passion! Im on the
early stage. Yahh i noe some are damn better dancer den mie.. But i think i
can do much better. I lurve to dance but why must i be afraid to show em
wat i can do. It doesnt matter if it looks bad on others..wat is important is
whether u had work hard on it! Im sure i did. Only fear tie mie down to
glitter upon the stage..I need somebody tat can really boost up my confidence.
To accept wat i can do and wat i cant do.
To accept and not accept
is wat i wish for
but im tied down
by something weird here
its something tat
i wanna get rid off
its something called FEAR.
